The other day, I had to laugh. A friend told me that she sees me as a calm mother. While I was flattered, it really made me wonder how on earth she got that idea. Unfortunately, I’m sure my children would have a different attitude about my usual level of calmness.
But it really made me stop and think about the public persona we put forward. I know that I don’t intentionally sugar-coat my struggles and frustrations as a mother. But my kids seem to generally be more well-behaved when they are out and about, so that could be part of the calm facade. And just the fact that we are out in public means that we are past the crazy part of the day when everyone has to get ready and out the door. Every day after about 9 or 9:30, I breathe a sigh of relief that the hard part is done.
At least until it comes time to make dinner…
As a mother of five, though, I definitely have to choose my battles. I simply don’t have time to get all upset about many of the things that used to bother me when I only had one or two children. There are things that I don’t even try and think about, like if my kids’ socks match (they prefer them not to!). There is only so much space in my (quite limited) short-term memory and I need to keep things like mealtime, the bus schedule, and preschool drop-off at the front and center.
So maybe I have been growing in my calm demeanor. I know my kids would appreciate it if I would!
A controlling mother, a missing daughter, and a family who is desperate for love. This post was inspired by the the psychological thriller Mother, Mother by Zoren Zailckas. Join From Left to Write on September 19 as we discuss Mother, Mother. As a member, I received a copy of the book for review purposes.